The North was plenty racist, not every Union soldier fought to end slavery, and Reconstruction was a disaster, I know. I call upon these fabricators-Sasquatch aside-to go full Union. I think it’s time for the people who sell windsocks, bespoke flags, and T-shirts on Amazon, Etsy, and their competitors to tap this market. There should be more ways for people who are left-ish of center, but who would still like some way to visually stake their claim to patriotism (even if only at their children’s insistence), to decorate for the Fourth.

My family’s collective excitement about the perfection of this wind spinner got me thinking. I found a Sasquatch American Flag wind spinner, one with the Bigfoot doing a little finger-pointing dance, and bought it to hang on the seasonally decorated shepherd’s crook in our front yard. And so, last year, for the first time in a long time, I started decorating for the Fourth. She wouldn’t be wrong: It’s not fair that we’ve had to cede-willingly or not-all stars and stripes to the right wing. This, my daughter would insist if she understood 15 percent of what I just wrote, is not fair.

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